(SFX: WOBBLING WHEEL CART)

(SFX: SLIGHT WOOD CREAKING)

SFX: SQUEAKY WHEEL OF A DOLLY

 

RYAN: Bridget, Bridget! Check this out!

 

BRIDGET: Whoa, Ryan, what’s with the giant wooden crate? 

 

RYAN: I’ve invested in something that is going to revolutionize Million Bazillion as we know it! I just need to open it up [GRUNTING]. 

 

(SFX: CROW BAR AGAINST WOOD, PRYING)

 

BRIDGET: What the? Be careful!

 

RYAN: Nearly there! Ow splinter! 

 

(SFX: WOOD FALLING ON CONCRETE)

SFX/MUSIC: CHEESY MYSTICAL MUSIC (Spooky? Quirky?) – maybe – Spooky Waltz in APM Music?)

 

BRIDGET:What does that say across the top? The All Questioning Questioni?  Whoa, Ryan, is this like, one of those old vintage fortune teller machines? Like they’d have at a circus or carnival or something? You put in a quarter and it spits out a card with your fortune written on it?

 

RYAN: Yeah our old friend, Gene, from the arcade machine warehouse specially modified it for us. Instead of giving out little fortunes, it gives out money questions from our listeners!

 

BRIDGET: Really? That’s amazing. That could really help us speed up our process! Can you imagine if we could answer more questions per season than ever before! 

 

RYAN: I know! This show would be unstoppable! Okay, let’s plug it in–[SFX LIGHT ELECTRICAL ZAP] 

 

[SFX: POWER DOWN

SFX: BULB EXPLODES]

 

BRIDGET: Annnnd… all the lights in the building just went out. 

 

RYAN: Hold on, let me fix that! 

 

[SFX: TOOLS SHUFFLING CROSS FADES WITH THEME]

 

-THEME MUSIC- 

 

BRIDGET: Welcome to Million Bazillion, the show that answers the questions you have about money. I’m Bridget. 

 

RYAN: And I’m Ryan. And we help dollars make more sense! Let’s hear today’s question, now from our very cool, high tech, and totally fixed-so-it’s-working-perfectly All Questioning Questioni Question Machine! 

 

VO: I am the All Questioning Questioni! You want answers, but I’ve got questions! 

 

(SFX: SUPERFAST MACHINE VENDING NOISE)

QUESTION MACHINE VO: (SPED, HIGHER PITCHED IN EDIT) Is money different in every country?Why do we have pennies? Why do we pay taxes? What is counterfeit money? Why do stocks go up and down? Why are the smaller versions of things more expensive? How does my money grow in a savings account? Why do banks pay you to keep your money there? 

 

BRIDGET: Whoa whoa whoa, I’m not sure you quite fixed it there, Ryan!

 

RYAN: Hold on, my bad, lemme tighten this last lugnut, [GRUNT]. 

 

(SFX SCRAPING)

 

BRIDGET: Wait, play those last two questions again. Maybe we can answer those? 

RYAN: Alright, let’s try this again. 

 

(SFX: NOT AS FAST MACHINE VENDING NOISE)

 

QUESTION MACHINE VO: Hi, Million Bazillion–

 

RYAN: Hold on, let me just bang on the side here–

 

SFX: BANGING (LIKE BANGING ON A VENDING MACHINE)

 

MAYBE: QUESTION MACHINE VO: Hi Million Bazillion my name is…

SFX: BANGING ON MACHINE UNTIL AUDIO SOUNDS NORMAL

 

TAPE: Hi Million Bazillion, my name is Perry and I live in Clarksville, Indiana. My question is, how does my money grow in a savings account? 

 

(SFX: MACHINE VENDING NOISE)

 

TAPE: Hello, my name is Cooper. I live in Sacramento California. I am 9. And my question is, why do banks pay you to keep your money there? Thanks! 

 

BRIDGET: Oh wow, it gave us two at once! Perry wants to know how money grows in a savings account, and Cooper wants to know why banks pay you to save with them.Well, these answers are kind of related. 

 

RYAN: Think we could answer them both this episode?

 

BRIDGET: We definitely can! So to answer these questions, we’re gonna need to talk about those savings accounts Perry mentioned and Cooper referenced.  That’s a place to keep money you don’t want or need to spend right away. What makes a savings account with a bank different from say, your piggy bank, an envelope in your dresser drawer-

 

RYAN:  Or a giant hole inside your mattress! Whoops, I shouldn’t have said that out loud….

 

BRIDGET: Wait, Ryan… you’re not actually keeping your money in your mattress are you? 

 

RYAN: …Well, not anymore! Now I have to find another place to hide it. Maybe there’s some room in Skimbleshanks’ litter box? 

 

(SFX: MEOW)

 

BRIDGET: Eww. Ryan you should really have that money in a savings account! Both Perry and Cooper are right, one of the cool things about savings accounts is that the bank will pay you interest for keeping your money with them. That means you can actually earn extra money on top of what you saved on your own. It’s called interest! 

 

RYAN: Interest?, I know that I have a lot of interests. Musical theater. Monster trucks. That one dress that looked white and gold or blue and black, depending on who you asked-

 

BRIDGET: No, not like that, interest when we’re talking about savings accounts means the money the bank pays YOU for keeping your money with them. 

 

RYAN: Hold up, hold on here. You’re telling me…the banks. Are paying you. For keeping your money. With them. So my money would be safe in the bank, AND my mattress would be more comfortable?! Like you can’t make this stuff up! 

 

BRIDGET: Ya know, understanding how banks and savings accounts work are critical skills that we should all learn as we’re growing up. 

 

RYAN: Yeah, but banks can also be…like the most boring places on earth. They can feel very grown up and stuffy. They have a lot of rules, and if you break those rules, you have to pay  fees. 

 

BRIDGET:  But there are so many things you HAVE to use a bank for when you’re an adult so might as well know how they work. And on the bright side, some banks do give out lollipops. 

 

RYAN: Really? I’ve only ever gotten free pens, but you have to work really hard to get it off the little chain. 

 

BRIDGET: Ooh, you are not supposed to take those home with you. 

 

RYAN:  Pishaw! Why would they put them out for you then? 

 

BRIDGET:  Ok we have some pens to return but when we come back, we’ll get the answer to Perry and Cooper’s  questions. Right after this. 

(SFX: MUSIC)

HOST: And now it’s time for asking random kids, not so random questions. Today’s question is, if you had your own bank, what would you name it?

KIDS: If I had my own bank, I would name it the penguin bank. I would name it the Kinder Interest Development bank, or the K ID bank, Cecilia’s US Bank, rah, rah, super bank, area 51 super stellar bank. If I had my own bank, I would name it crazy snake,

HOST: That was Elena and Benjamin in Texas, Ashwin in Washington, DC, Cecilia in Colorado, Emiliano in California, and Sebastian in Minnesota, this has been asking random kids, not so random questions!

(SFX: MUSIC ENDS)

RYAN: And we’re back! Today we’re going to learn about savings accounts, and also get the answer to some insightful questions from Perry and Cooper, that have to do with how banks actually PAY you to keep your money with them. I think we’re really onto something here. I can’t wait to see how this plays out. 

 

BRIDGET: So for this one, I think we need to actually GO to a bank, right? And maybe we can ask someone there? 

 

RYAN: Awww, the bank?! It’s so boring! I don’t want to go to the baaaank.

 

BRIDGET: Ryan, come on, this where they keep all the money, you know it’s gonna be cool! Look, if it makes you feel better, I’ll let YOU pick the bank. 

 

RYAN: Really? Okay, well, there’s one a few blocks from here that I’ve seen but have never gone inside. Can we go there?. 

 

BRIDGET: Sure, let’s go! 

 

RYAN: Race you there!

 

SFX: TRANSITIONAL MUSIC STING

 

BRIDGET: Uh, Ryan, are you sure this is a bank? It doesn’t really look like one…

 

[FADE UP:

SFX: BIG TOP CARNIVAL MUSIC

SFX: CLOWN CAR HONKING

SFX: SEALS BARKING]

 

RYAN: (READING SIGN) “Big Top Bank”?  This bank caters to people who work at the circus! Isn’t it amazing! 

 

BRIDGET: Aren’t banks supposed to be quiet and calm? Why are there clowns here? Clowns are not my favorite. 

 

RYAN: Look at that pony riding his little tricycle! Look, he’s even got a little matching hat!

 

(SFX: PONY NEIGHS

SFX: SQUEAKING WOBBLY WHEEL

SFX: LITTLE BIKE BELL)

 

BRIDGET: And is that a lady breathing fire? 

 

(SFX: FIRE BURST)

 

FIRE BREATHING WOMAN: [OFF MIC] Ooh, excuse me. 

 

RYAN: Oh, uh, Bridget, here, sorta singed your hair there a little.

 

BRIDGET: What??

 

RYAN: [UNCONVINCINGLY]  It’s really not that bad. Oh look, it’s our turn, there’s a teller free!

 

BRIDGET: [LOW AND DIRECTLY TO RYAN] She’s wearing a clown nose and the teller at the window next to her is actually a chimpanzee in a bow tie. 

 

[SFX: CHIMPANZEE]

 

RYAN: [TO BRIDGET] I know, isn’t it great!? The chimp has a customer, so let’s go with the clown.

 

TELLER/PEPPY PENNY: [OFF MIC AS BRIDGET AND RYAN WALK UP, THEN ON MIC]  Next customer, step right up! Step right up!. Hi there, I’m Peppy Penny, welcome to Big Top Bank, the premier banking establishment for circus professionals! How can I help you?

 

RYAN: Hello there uh, Ms. Penny. My name’s Ryan and this is my co-host, Bridget. We host a podcast for kids about money and we’re trying to answer some questions from listeners who basically want to know…why are you paying people to bank with you?

 

BRIDGET: Yeah, he means interest, why would this bank, or any bank, pay people to save money? How does the math work on that? 

 

PEPPY PENNY: Oh that’s a great question! I would be so pleased to answer! See, it all comes down to this…the bank WANTS you to be a good saver and is trying to give you reasons to grow your savings. Because when you deposit your hard earned savings at Big Top Bank, your cash doesn’t just sit in the vault, in a little box with your name on it.  

 

RYAN: It doesn’t? But aren’t you supposed to be keeping everyone’s money safe?? What kind of clowns run this place?

 

PEPPY PENNY: Well, there’s Bozo the clown, Binky the clown, Coco the clown- 

 

RYAN: OK, fine, I walked right into that one. But I don’t mean which literal clowns sit on the board of this bank. I mean, like, what kinda business are you running here and what are you doing with everyone’s money??

 

PEPPY PENNY: 

 

The bank’s business is to lend that money back out into the world. It starts to move through your community in the form of loans that can help people buy a house, buy a car, start a business! But to make those loans, the bank needs lots of customers who are good savers, with nice full savings accounts. Then the bank can borrow that money from you, and make those loans. The people who GET those loans will pay them back eventually, plus a little bit extra. That’s how the bank makes money.

 

BRIDGET & RYAN: [FEIGNING UNDERSTANDING, STILL WITH QUESTIONS] Oh, yeah, right. 

 

\PEPPY CONT: Like see that clown over there?

 

(SFX: RUBBER SHOES SQUEAKING AND HONK HONK)) 

 

BRIDGET: The one with the rubber shoes? Yeah.

 

PEPPY PENNY: That’s Jumbles. Last year he wanted to settle down with his wife, and have a few clown kids. They wanted to buy a clown town car- y’know for his family to cram into- but didn’t have enough money to pay in cash. So we loaned them the money and they paid us back  plus a little extra, over time. Did the same thing when he came back to buy a clown town house! That house loan is called a mortgage! And they pay us back, a little bit each month, plus the interest 

 

RYAN: [UNCONVINCED] I see…

 

(SFX: CLOWN KIDS RUN BY)

 

 PEPPY PENNY: And see that man over there? The Great Marzipan?

 

RYAN: Uh, yeah, with all the tiny dogs?

 

PEPPY PENNY: Sure! He’s a loyal customer to Big Top Bank. Years ago, he came in with an idea to open a touring circus act featuring small dogs. You know, chihuahuas, a few terriers, and a little pomeranian in a poodle skirt. 

 

[SFX: CHORUS OF SMALL DOGS]

 

PEPPY PENNY CONT: It was the pomeranian in a poodle skirt that really did it, our Bank Manager knew The Great Marzipan had a winning idea. He just needed some extra money to help fund his first tour. So the Great Marzipan took out a loan of $50,000 from this bank! 

 

RYAN: [INCREDULOUS] You just gave some guy $50,000 for a dog show? 

 

PEPPY PENNY: (CLEARS THROAT) No, we LOANED him the money. And the Great Marzipan ended up paying back the $50,000 we gave him. Plus an extra $5,000 to us in interest. We wouldn’t lend money to someone we didn’t think would pay it back – that’s just not good business!

 

RYAN: But I’m confused- What does the interest the Great Marzipan pays on his loan have to do with the interest the bank pays me for my savings account?

 

PEPPY PENNY: You’re right, the bank is paying OUT interest, to savings account holders, and getting PAID interest by loan holders! Same word, it can be kinda confusing! 

 

(BB & RP: Yeah. Uh huh.) 

 

PEPPY PENNY CONT: Just think of INTEREST as “the price for borrowing money”. When you’re lending your money to the bank, by keeping it in your savings account, you get to be the one paid the interest! 

 

RYAN: How much money are we talking about here? How much am I gonna make off interest?

 

PEPPY PENNY: It depends, first, how much you have saved, and then the bank’s interest rate. Some banks today offer pretty low rates like less than one percent. 

 

RYAN: Ouch! That’s less than a penny on a dollar.

 

PEPPY PENNY: But others offer closer to 4 or 5%. You just have to ask the bank. 

 

RYAN: Wait a second, what’s to stop the bank from lending out so much money, they won’t have any of it around when I need it? 

 

PEPPY PENNY: Oh! Well off course, Big Top Circus Bank is insured by the FDIC, for up to $250,000 per account.

 

RYAN: FDIC? What’s that?

 

PEPPY PENNY: The FDIC is part of the government. It was formed after banks lost a ton of peoples’ money during the Great Depression of the 1930s. 

 

RYAN: That sounds bad….

 

PEPPY PENNY: Yeah, it was bad. People weren’t too excited to put their money in the bank after that. To restore everyone’s trust in banks, the government insured it. So that means even though the bank is using the money in your account to loan out, you’re always able to come back and get the amount of money you’ve deposited at any time. 

 

RYAN: Wow, so what happens when a big bank fails now?

 

PEPPY PENNY: Ehhh, government just kinda bails them out.

 

RYAN: Well, this has been really informative. Thanks for your help, Peppy! 

 

PEPPY PENNY: Any time! [SHOUTING OFF MIC] Next customer!

 

[SFX: RETURN OF CIRCUS FX THAT FADE AS BRIDGET AND RYAN LEAVE THE BUILDING]

 

BRIDGET:  Alright so the banks pay you extra money when you have a savings account with them and that’s called interest. It can help you make more money from your savings than keeping your dollars locked away in a box, or mattress. And the bank does this so they can do the other part of their business, making loans and charging interest on those loans. Ryan, we did it! We answered Cooper and Perry’s questions!

 

RYAN: And in record time!

 

BRIDGET: Yeah, we’re really on a roll, why don’t we head back and see if the All Questioning Questioni Question Machine has any MORE questions we can answer!

 

RYAN: You got it! See! Machines always make everything better! I see absolutely no risk or downside! OK, we’ll answer more questions… when we come back!

 

–BREAK–

 

BRIDGET: Welcome back to Million Bazillion! Today we answered some questions about savings accounts from listeners Perry and Cooper. 

 

(SFX:TOOLS CLANKING ABOUT)

 

RYAN: (DISTANT, OFF-MIC) Ughh! Arrgh! Just work already! 

 

(SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZ SOUND)

 

RYAN: Ahhh, it just shocked me!

 

(SFX: KICKING THE MACHINE)

 

BRIDGET: And well, the other thing you should know is Ryan bought us this really cool Questions machine. Which is still kind of malfunctioning. That’s why we had two TWO questions today! But it was no biggie! Anyway, Ryan’s hard at work trying to get it to give us our NEXT question. I’m sure it’s going really well!

 

RYAN: I’m almost there [GRUNTING] and got it! Okay!

 

(SFX: MACHINE VENDING NOISE)

 

QUESTION MACHINE VO: Hi, my name is Roman – 

 

TAPE: Hi, my name is Roman from Rockville, Maryland and my question is what is compound interest and how does it work. Thank you. 

 

BRIDGET: Thank you, Roman, for listening, and for that question about compound interest! This is actually highly relevant for today’s episode. I’m starting to wonder if the All Questioning Questioni Machine is actually just an ATM in disguise! Get it? Because all the questions are about banks? 

 

RYAN:  Unfortunately we can’t ask it anything. It’s the All Questioning Questioni, not the All-Answering Answerioni. 

 

BRIDGET: Okay so remember when we went to Big Top Bank and learned that banks pay YOU, the customer, for keeping your money at their bank and it’s called  interest?  Well most banks in this country calculate how much interest to pay each customer each month using compound interest. It’s kinda like this…

 

(SFX/MUX: CIRCUS EXPLAINER MUSIC – HEAVY ON THE XYLOPHONES )

 

BRIDGET CONT: Pretend you have 10 bananas. And you’re gonna keep those bananas at my banana bank…and I’m going to pay you compound interest for keeping them there. 

 

RYAN: Uh, oh, okay, bananas, sure, I’ve got ‘em right here. In fact, how about I just juggle these 10 bananas, that’s seems easy. What’s my interest rate going to be? 

 

SFX: JUGGLING NOISE (CAN BE SOFT THUMPING)

 

BRIDGET: The rate of interest I’m offering is 10%.

 

RYAN: Wow, 10%?? I’m heading to that bank right now! 

 

BRIDGET: Well I’m just using that number because it makes the math a little easier for this example. Remember, Peppy Penny said interest rates right now are closer to 1% to 5%. 

 

RYAN: [DISAPPOINTED] Oh, right right. Proceed. 

 

BRIDGET: So if the interest rate is 10%, that means for every 10 bananas you have, I will give you one banana. And I’m going to calculate that once a month. 

 

RYAN: It’s a deal. 

 

BRIDGET: So you give me 10 bananas, and At the end of the first month, you get 1 new banana that I’m paying you in interest. 

 

RYAN: Right, right because , because 10% of 10 is one. 

 

BRIDGET: Now here’s the compound part… I’m adding that new- interest banana to the same pile of bananas that you first brought into the bank. Uh, here, let me add that banana, do you have room to hold these 11 bananas?

 

RYAN: I can manage. Just throw it at me. 

 

BRIDGET: Right. So then next month…I’m calculating your interest based on 11 bananas. Your interest rate is about one more banana. So we add it to the pile and now you have 12 bananas. 

 

RYAN: This is great! I didn’t even really do anything but I have two more bananas than when I started! Kinda wish I hadn’t committed to this juggling bit though. It’s both hard to do and our listeners can’t see it because we’re a podcast.

 

BRIDGET: I’m sure they appreciate the spirit of it though! So COMPOUND INTEREST is when your INTEREST banana starts making INTEREST bananas. Let’s fast forward a couple months. 

(SFX: FAST FORWARD SOUND) You’re still making compound interest. And now you have 20 bananas! The 10 you started with, and 10 new bananas I have paid you in “interest” over these last ten months. 

 

SFX: PILE OF BANANAS FALLING ON FLOOR

 

RYAN: Okay, New idea, how about I take my 20 bananas, and just hold them, like in a basket or something. 

 

BRIDGET: Good idea. And guess what. Here’s where compound interest starts to get really cool…when you’re the one making the interest and not having to pay it.  I’m now going to give you two new bananas a month in interest. Because I’m using your pile of 20 bananas to calculate that 10% interest, so now I owe you 2 bananas every month. Your money is going to keep growing, and the best part, the interest you already earned is helping you make MORE money in the future. 

 

RYAN: So…compound interest is like, having a lot of bananas?

 

BRIDGET: Uh, exactly.

 

RYAN: But why would I ever want this many bananas in the first place?

 

BRIDGET: I don’t know. Maybe you have a gorilla.

 

RYAN: Maaaybe, but even a gorilla’s not gonna eat that many bananas.

 

BRIDGET: Maybe you need peels to throw at other cars during races, like in MarioKart.

 

RYAN: Hmm, good point. I’m onboard now.

 

BRIDGET: Wonderful! Okay now…I want to share one other cool compound interest trick with you. For this, I’m going to ask a friend to help me out, and he’s going tell us a really cool way for figuring out the power of compound interest when it comes to growing your savings. It’s called The Rule of 72. 

 

SFX/MUSIC: GOOD EXPLAINER STUFF

 

JOZEF_1: My first name is Jozef  and I’m from Arkansas.

JOZEF_2: So Rule 72 is something that helps you calculate how long it will take you to double your money. 

 

BRIDGET: This is so practical! ! And the way it works is, you take 72 and you divide it  by the interest rate on your savings account. And the result is the number of years it will take you to double your money, if you just leave it in the account and don’t add to it. Jozef , can you give us an example? 

 

JOZEF_3: So the interest rate is going to be 10%. It’s 72 divided by 10 in this case. If it’s 72 divided by 10, then you add the dot into the middle of 7 and then, that’s 7 point two. 

 

BRIDGET: Amazing! So in 7.2 years, if you didn’t touch your money but you let it sit in the bank at an interest rate of 10%, you’d double your money! I love that trick! 

 

MUSIC OUT

 

RYAN: Wow, thanks Jozef! I’m really starting to get the hang of all this. Maybe I should open a savings account after all!

 

BRIDGET: That’s a great idea! 

 

(SFX: DISTANT CHIMP “OOO-AHH” SOUNDS)

 

RYAN: Uh oh! Looks like that chimpanzee from the clown bank followed home and wants in on our banana stash! For him, bananas are like money!

 

BRIDGET: Now hold that thought about the bank account. We’re going to bake a bunch of banana bread real quick  and be right back! 

 

(SFX: CHIMP “OOO-AHH” SOUNDS GET CLOSER)

(SFX: DOORBELL)

 

RYAN: Uhh, go away! No one’s home!

     

– MUSIC BREAK–

 

BRIDGET: Hey everyone, we’re back, and we’ve got something special for Ryan for those of you who might be interested in starting a bank account.

 

RYAN: That’s right! I’m ready to join the legions of adults with bank accounts! A bank, like any financial institution, can be a little scary. But that’s OK, because I’m going to get help from a listener who in fact HAS her own bank account, give it up for Ava!! . 

 

(music sting)

 

BRIDGET: Yeah!

AVA: Hey there, I’m Ava from Minneapolis! I love dogs and swimming. I’ve been banking since I was 7 years old. 

 

RYAN: Okay, I can tell I’m in good hands! For you listeners out there, feel free to pause and write anything down, or come back and listen to this section a few times. You know how a podcast works.

 

BRIDGET: And we’ve got more information for you in the shownotes for this episode and at our website, marketplace dot org slash million. So Ava, I bet before you picked your bank, you did some research, right? Because there are a lot of types of banks out there, like your traditional bank, small banks, big banks, credit unions. Even online banks that have no physical location! What’d you end up going with?  

 

AVA: I went with a traditional bank which is convenient because it has a location right near my house. 

 

BRIDGET:  Well we should do some before we get started!  Pick a couple of banks that are easy for us  to get to, and then let’s try to learn more about what they offer, like what interest rate are they offering? 

 

AVA : I’d also wonder if they have a special account for kids under 18. Do they recommend a joint account or a custodial account for a kid like me? Do I need to have a minimum amount of money to get started? 

 

RYAN: Wow, those are…really good questions. Ava, how did you pick the bank you ended up at?

 

AVA: Well I went with the bank my parents use!

 

BRIDGET: Ooh, I bet a lot of people do that. And one last thing, you’ll need identification to open an account, maybe your birth certificate or your social security card. And you’re probably gonna need your grown-up to go with you. So once you got all that you’re all set.  

 

AVA: Then it’s time to head to the bank. You are excited, you are ready. You got this. 

 

(SFX: 1960s BATMAN BOOMERANG NOISE)

 

RYAN: So, here we are. Outside the bank. Not the kooky Circus bank from earlier. Just a regular bank?

 

BRIDGET: You’re not a circus performer! You’re a podcast host! And until they make a bank for podcast hosts, we’re just here at the regular bank! 

 

RYAN: [FORLORNLY DRAMATIC] Ah yes, always the practical one aren’t you. Are we ready to go inside? 

 

AVA: Yeah, let’s go. 

 

BRIDGET: Ready as I’ll ever be! 

 

(SFX: MARBLE ECHOY HALLS

SFX: HEELS ON MARBLE)

(SFX: Less hubub, more shushed activity like a library)

 

AVA: So this is one of those fancy banks, like with marble floors and walls and high ceilings. 

 

RYAN: [LOUD WHISPER] Yeah, what’s the vibe at the bank you go to?

 

AVA: [LOUD WHISPER} Eh, it doesn’t have marble or anything. It’s got carpeting and everything is a sort of tan, grey color. They do have free coffee though. 

 

RYAN: Nice. So what are we gonna do next, find our spot in line and wait our turn? 

 

AVA: Yep, pretty much. See if they have any free pens.  

 

RYAN: Oh no, I’ve heard about those, turns out they’re not free!

 

AVA : Weird. 

 

BRIDGET: Okay Ryan, remember to be polite to the teller when it’s your turn at the banking window. Speak clearly and let them know you’d like to open an account.

 

AVA: When I opened my account, they had me and my mom go over to sit at a desk with someone, to go over all the paperwork.  

 

RYAN: [RESPOND TO AVA]. If I know grownups and their love of paperwork, AND I DO, then at the end, I’m going to guess you’re going to need to some sign some things and they’ll give you copies of all the documents. I guess if you have a safe hiding spot at home you USED to keep your dollars in, maybe you can put your banking paperwork there. You will never, ever look at it again. But it’s good to have around, I guess.

 

AVA: But the bank is also going to send you a statement every month or two. Either in the mail or online. And my banker told me to make sure I’m double checking it every month, to look at my balance and make sure the amount is what I think it should be.  

 

RYAN: And to check your interest right? 

 

AVA: Oh, yeah, that too. 

 

BRIDGET: Yeah, Ryan and listeners. You might want to tell the banker your goal for opening your account. Are you growing your savings account for college? Planning on buying a new bike? What about you, Ava? What’s your goal?

 

AVA: I’m saving up for a car and a house. I think it’ll take a while to save up enough money for those things so I’m starting now. 

 

BRIDGET: Oh. Right on! Okay Ryan, you’re up next! Ava and I are gonna wait over here. 

 

SFX: RYAN WALKING TO TELLER 

 

TELLER: [OFF MIC/LOW] Hello sir, how can I help you today?

 

RYAN: [OFF MIC] Um, I’d like to open an account like a big boy. 

 

TELLER: Great, I can help you out in a second

 

BRIDGET: He’s doing a great job!

 

AVA : Yeah, he’s barely sweating at all! 

 

TELLER: Great, I can help you out in a second. Feel free to take a treat from the bowl.

 

RYAN: Um no thanks. As an adult, lollipops aren’t really my thing. But thanks for offering. 

 

BRIDGET: Did he just turn down the free lollipop? I’m impressed! 

 

RYAN: I have 40 bananas to put into my account. How quickly will this savings account start paying me interest?

 

TELLER: Huh?

 

RYAN: Uh…nevermind. Here’s 20 bucks I want to put in my account. The rest I’ll need to get from under my mattr–I mean, from an undisclosed location, soon. 

 

TELLER: You got it!

 

(SFX: STEPS RETURNING TO BRIDGET AND AVA)

 

RYAN: Alright gang, I’m all set! I’ve got my savings account! Ava, thank you so much for your help!

 

AVA: You’re welcome, Ryan. I guess I better get back now. Thanks for having me. 

 

BRIDGET: Bye! 

 

-MUSIC STING-

 

RYAN: Well, looks like we answered our machine’s many money questions today- 

 

(SFX: MACHINE VENDING NOISE, ON REPEAT)

(SFX: PAPER FLYING AROUND)

 

RYAN: [TO HIMSELF] No no no, what is even happening here!

 

BRIDGET: Ryan, what’s wrong, is the All Questioning Questioni Question Machine okay?

 

RYAN: Now that it’s working again, It just won’t stop spitting out questions! (FRANTIC) “Why don’t they print $2 bills anymore?” Bridget, what’s the answer?

 

BRIDGET: (FRANTIC) Actually, they still do! They’re just not as common as other denominations-

 

RYAN: (FAST) Next question- “Where does the word dollar come from?”

 

BRIDGET: (FAST) Uhh, ​uhh, from a silver-coin called the “thaler”, shortened from Joachimsthaler, a Bohemian currency from the 1500s- 

 

RYAN: (FAST) No time to elaborate! “What’s a recession?”

 

BRIDGET: (FAST) We did a whole episode on this. Season 5, episode 2!

 

RYAN: (FAST) “Why is money green?”, “How much money does the President make?”,  “What is rental arbitrage?”

 

BRIDGET: We definitely don’t have time to answer all those in this episode! It’s recap time!

 

RYAN: Ugh, okay, I’ll just unplug it. 

 

(SFX: POWER DOWN)

 

RYAN: Okay so, we’ll save these questions for another show. But what did we learn today, Bridget? 

 

BRIDGET: Hopefully a lot of great answers to questions from Roman, Cooper, and Perry! Like, I think we learned a whole lot about how to make our savings grow. Now I know that saving can be hard. We didn’t talk about that in THIS episode, but we have on this show in the past. Here’s the thing, saving for the future is still important. Remember, we’ve talked about inflation before too. With inflation, even if you hold onto your money in a safe spot and don’t spend it, like Ryan used to do with the cash under his mattress, it’s going to buy you less over time.  And so looking for safe tools that help you save more, faster, than you could on your own, is a good idea. 

 

RYAN: That’s right, and one of the ways we figure out if a tool is safe for us is really learning how it works, how to use it best, and understanding the risk involved. Savings accounts with FDIC insurance, can be a pretty safe bet. And then there are a lot of options out there for you. There’s the bank around the corner, your local credit union, or even an online bank. Just depends what you’re looking for. Plus, don’t forget to keep a few hundred bucks under your mattress…. Juuuuuust in case!

 

BRIDGET: Ryan!

 

–THEME MUSIC–

 

BRIDGET: That’s it for this episode of Million Bazillion! We’ve got more about savings accounts in the show  page for this episode and on our show page, marketplace dot org slash million. 

 

RYAN: We’d also LOVE To hear from you, if this episode inspired you on your savings journey! Did you decide to open up a bank account? What are you saving for? And do you have any other questions for Million Bazillion? We’d love to hear those too!

 

BRIDGET: Special thanks to the smart people who helped us answer this question. Including Kelsey Havermann and Blair Bernstein at the American Banking Association Foundation, Marketplace’s Justin Ho, and Dominik Mjartan at Optus Bank in Columbia, South Carolina. 

 

RYAN:  Million Bazillion is brought to you by Marketplace, from American Public Media. This episode was written and hosted by me, Ryan Perez, and Bridget Bodnar. 

 

BRIDGET: And we had some extra help voicing this episode from Mitchell Hartman, Jasmine Romero, Jay Siebold, and Bekah Wineman. Plus, we got some great tips about banking and compound interest from Jozef  and Ava! 

 

RYAN: Jasmine Romero is our editor.

Courtney Bergsieker is our producer.

Marissa Cabrera is our senior producer.

 

BRIDGET: This episode was sound designed by Chris Julin and mixed by Bekah Wineman. Our theme music was created by Wonderly. 

 

RYAN: Bridget Bodnar is the Director of Podcasts at Marketplace. 

Francesca Levy is the Executive Director of Digital 

Neal Scarbrough is the VP and General Manager.

BRIDGET: Million Bazillion is funded in part by the Sy Syms Foundation, partnering with organizations and people working for a better and more just future since 1985. And special thanks to The Ranzetta Family Charitable Fund and Next Gen Personal Finance for providing the start-up funding for this podcast, and continuing to support Marketplace in our work to make younger audiences smarter about the economy.

RYAN: If Million Bazillion is helping your family have important conversations about money, consider making a one-time donation today at marketplace-dot-org-slash-givemillion, and thanks for your support.