Million Bazillion: S4 E4 Money Mania Script/Transcript 

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-THEME MUSIC-

 

(MUSIC: GAME SHOW SUSPENSE MUSIC FADES IN)

 

RYAN: Welcome to Million Bazillion!

 

BRIDGET: Where we help dollars make more sense! I’m Bridget.

 

RYAN: And I’m Ryan. And boy have we got an exciting show for you! We are going to answer FIVE questions, sent in by listeners, all in one normal length Million Bazillion episode!

 

BRIDGET: I’m so excited!! There are some clever questions that listeners observed when they were shopping, questions about types of money bills, questions about the money words we use…really good ones!

 

RYAN: But wait, there’s more! Because I’ve also invited our Question Askers to be here with us today!

 

BRIDGET: You did? When? What?

 

RYAN: And now you’re probably wondering about this elaborate obstacle course I’ve set up behind me! Well let me tell you!

 

(MUSIC: GAME SHOW SUSPENSE MUSIC)

 

RYAN: [IN SLIGHTLY ANNOUNCER-Y VOICE]  Welcome to our super fun game show, Million Bazillion Presents: Money Mania! Five Million Bazillionaires will learn the answer to their money questions and compete in an amazing set of daring challenges!

 

BRIDGET: How long have you been working on this?? Is that a slide? How long have you been collecting these boxes? And…why?

 

RYAN: Look, we work really hard, every episode, to find out the answers to our listeners’ questions. This time, we’re going to show everyone that finding these answers isn’t easy! By making our question askers go through a grueling obstacle course!

 

BRIDGET: [SKEPTICAL] Uh-huh. So how is this even going to work?

 

RYAN: It’s simple, Bridget. Our contestants, gathered over there, will each share their question. You’ve already gotten the answers from experts, which we’ll share. And then we’ll test the players’ understanding of the answer by asking them to complete an exciting activity of my own devising!

 

BRIDGET: And…the kids are okay with this? Like, you got permission from their grown ups and all that?

 

RYAN: What do you take me for? [Nervous caught to change subject] Let’s meet our contestants and get those answers!…

 

RYAN: …right after this!

 

(MUSIC: BIG STING)

 

–Asking Random Kids NOT SO Random Questions–

 

ANNOUNCER: And now it’s time for asking random kids NOT SO random questions. Today’s question is: What would you do if money really did grow on trees?

 

RANDOM KIDS: “Mommy, that’s a good question.” “I would probably pick money off of the trees.” “I would plant lots of trees in a park so everyone could get some money.” “I would climb on every money tree and pick all the money.” “I would just take all of it off and become rich.” “Buy a money tree.” “Beg my mom to get me some money seeds and then I would grow a tree and be rich.” “I maybe would get a sapling from one of the trees that produces money and see if it works if you plant it. It might take a long time to grow.” “I would search for rare trees for rare bills.” “Have a basket and I would pick the money off trees and I would carry it back home.” “Sometimes I feel that like, trees have feelings. And if it had money, it would want to be appreciated, not just because it had money, because of who it was, because it was a tree.”

 

ANNOUNCER: That was… Paloma and Aaron from New York City. William from Pittstown, New Jersey. Roena from Louisville Kentucky, Ayla from Springfield, Ohio. Joel from Missouri and Norah from St. Louis. Ava from Minneapolis, and Mickey and Joshua from Denver. This has been asking random kids not so random questions.

 

(SFX: Applause)

(MUSIC: GAME SHOW MUSIC)

 

RYAN: Alright, let’s play the Million Bazillion Presents: Money Mania “Extreme Obstacle Course Challenge!” After unveiling the answer to their questions, each player will have to compete in a challenge that demonstrates their UNDERSTANDING of the concept!

 

BRIDGET: Ooh, and, I have this super cool trophy we can use as a prize. Check it out.

 

(SFX: GLINTING SHINY SOUND)

 

RYAN: That is the most magnificent trophy I’ve ever seen! Five feet tall, made of shining platinum and crystals! You’re saying one of these million bazillionaires will WIN that?

 

BRIDGET: Yeah, they sure will!

 

RYAN: That trophy is simply mesmerizing, but, uh, on with the games! Please welcome our first player, Nico, from West Lafayette, Indiana!!

 

NICO: Hi, I’m Nico and I’m eight.

 

RYAN: Nico, tell us a fact about yourself.

 

NICO: I always carry a little stuffed bunny named Owl.

 

RYAN: That’s great, I hope he’s here to help you today! Now, Nico, tell us about your question.

 

NICO: I wanted to know, what can you do with a $100 dollar bill?

 

BRIDGET: Tell us Nico, what inspired this question?

 

NICO: Sometimes I see a sign taped up on a door that says: “no $100 dollar bills allowed.”

 

BRIDGET: Great observation, Nico! So there are a couple of ways to approach that question…Here’s one answer, from Ellen Feingold, the curator of the numismatic collection at the Smithsonian, that’s the coin and paper money collection. And she’s a Million Bazillion friend of the show.

 

ELLEN FEINGOLD: First of all, it’s a treasure map to the beginning of our country, to that founding phase in our national history. So if you look at the front of it, you can see Benjamin Franklin and he was also one of the authors of our founding documents. The Declaration of Independence and also the Constitution. Then if you turn it over you see Independence Hall in Philadelphia, which is where those founding documents were ratified. But if you don’t want to learn your history and you want to do something totally different and creative with your 100 dollar bill, you can turn it into art.

 

BRIDGET: Okay, so hundred dollar bills as art! Ryan, can you tell Nico what his challenge is going to be?

 

RYAN: Nico, you will have one minute to make these ten 100 dollar bills into art!

 

NICO: What kind of a challenge is this??

 

RYAN: I’m setting the timer! And go!

 

(SFX: CROWD CHEERS. RAPID PAPER SWISHING SOUNDS)

 

BRIDGET: Wow, Nico’s decided to go with some elaborate animal origami.

 

(SFX: NICO MUTTERINGS)

 

BRIDGET: So Ryan, there’s another part to Nico’s question. Businesses don’t always accept $100 bills so Nico I think is also wondering, why bother making them if we can’t use ‘em?

 

RYAN: That’s right, I’ve seen the sign at the cash registers before. “No $100 bills accepted” It’s a classic, right up there with “No shirt, no shoes, no service.”

 

BRIDGET: So yes, some stores don’t accept those bills. They might be  worried the bill might be fake or counterfeit. One hundred dollar bills are one of the most-often-counterfeited bills out there. If the store did get tricked, they’d be out a lot of money!

 

NICO: (MUTTERING) Right over left, match up the corners…

 

RYAN: That’s right, Bridget. And if a store is going to accept hundred dollar bills, they also have to have enough cash on hand to make change.

 

BRIDGET: So true. But generally, hundred dollar bills are actually the most widely circulated American bill, that means they’re used most often.

 

RYAN: Mmhmm. . One place that probably is going to accept a hundred dollar bill? Big chain grocery stores because you’re more likely to spend a lot of money there, maybe even hundreds of dollars! And that’s just for a jar of peanut butter. Inflation, am I right??

 

(SFX: AUDIENCE LAUGHTER.)

 

RYAN: Thanks, folks! Relevant! This show is current and relevant! I’m relevant!

 

(SFX: FLUTTERING)

 

RYAN: And looks like Nico’s made some flying money butterflies!

 

BRIDGET: I was NOT expecting that! Okay, he’s got 2 more to go!

 

RYAN: And he’s done! Nico’s done it!

 

(SFX: BELL RINGS. CROWD CHEERS.) (MUSIC: CELEBRATORY MUSIC PLAYS)

 

NICO: Phew! I wasn’t sure I was going to make that one!

 

RYAN: This money zoo is one of the most exquisite things I’ve seen in my whole life, complete with an origami unicorn that reminds me of a dream I had. Weird. Judges, write down your score!

 

BRIDGET:  Nico, I hope you learned that some people still really like 100 dollar bills and find them really useful…even if some of the stores around you apparently don’t.

 

RYAN: Ok, Nico, your mini-prize for successfully completing this round is a framed photo of everyone’s second favorite Benjamin, Ben Affleck. Hope you enjoy it and let’s get those ten 100 dollar bills back from you.

 

NICO: Ten? You only gave me eight.

 

RYAN: Really? I coulda sworn…

 

NICO: [Sinister Laugh]

 

RYAN: Okay, well, next contestant.

 

(MUSIC: EXCITING GAME SHOW MUSIC)

 

RYAN: Alright, up next we have…Zophia, from Castle Rock, Colorado!

 

ZOPHIA: Hi! I’m Zophia, I’m 9.

 

(SFX: APPLAUSE)

 

RYAN: Zophia, tell us a fun fact about yourself.

 

ZOPHIA: I am on a swim team and I went to state competition.

 

RYAN: Wow! Really?  I’m a swimmer too. I still use floaties for safety though. Okay, now tell us your question, Zophia.

 

ZOPHIA: When holiday stuff is out of season, what do stores do with it?

 

RYAN: What a great question. Zophia, I’ve always assumed they throw it in the garbage, but that can’t be right.  When did you start wondering this?

 

ZOPHIA: I was in a store when I saw one day, there were items for Valentine’s Day. Then the next day, they were all gone.

 

(MUSIC: MARIMBA/XYLOPHONE PLAYS PLAYFUL MUSIC)

 

BRIDGET: Well I like this question because you noticed something about the world around you and you wanted to know more. So we called up Manini Madia for the answer. She’s an adjunct professor of Marketing at Columbia Business School and a managing director at Accenture.

 

MANINI MADIA: We should start with how they decide how much seasonal stock to buy. Stores try to forecast, which means estimating what consumers are going to want to buy. And if they get the number wrong then they’re going to try to get rid of that stock by putting it on sale. Another thing they could do, some stores may have the space in their back rooms to store items and they can just pull those items out again for the next year. They might donate it. Another thing they can do is they can sell that stock at a really really low discount to what’s called a liquidator. And a liquidator is a store like TJ Maxx or Marshalls. And then the third and final thing that companies might do with excess inventory is they could throw it away as garbage or use it for fuel and burn it.

 

BRIDGET: Whoa. Stores have some really good reasons to make their best guess possible on how much holiday stuff to buy. And who knew there were stores that existed just to sell stuff other stores couldn’t! Let’s turn now to Zophia’s challenge. Zophia, here’s what you gotta do…we have a massive pile of decorations from every holiday. We’ve got Valentine’s Day, Grandparent’s Day, 4th of July, you get the idea. Your challenge is to put the correct decorations into the bin labeled for its holiday, way on the other side of the field.

 

(MUSIC: SUSPENSEFUL, INTENSE MUSIC PLAYS)

 

RYAN [INTERRUPTING]: AND to get to the other side of the field, you’ll have to swim through this lava!

 

BRIDGET: What? No, please tell me that’s not real lava!

 

RYAN: Ahem, no, it’s not REAL lava. Zophia, It’s tomato soup. What do you think of this challenge?

 

ZOPHIA: It’s kind of weird.

 

BRIDGET: But I know you can do it!  And you have two minutes. Go!

 

ZOPHIA: (BATTLE CRY)

 

(SFX: SPLASH)

 

BRIDGET: Let’s talk some more about the answer to Zophia’s question. Stores spend a lot of time thinking about their merchandise, the stuff they’re selling. Sometimes they’re planning a year and a half in advance for a holiday.

 

RYAN: And she’s made it across the lava pool! Now to her sorting challenge! See all those clear plastic bins? I got them on sale!

 

(SFX: BOXES OPENING AND CLOSING. STUFF MOVING AROUND AND HITTING EACH OTHER)

 

ZOPHIA: Clover leaves over here, the red white and blue jello goes in the Fourth of July pile. The menorah is for Hanukkah.

 

RYAN:She’ll be busy for a while, and meanwhile, let’s go back to how stores choose the holiday stuff they want to sell. This is big business, this is THE business if you will. These stores are using big data, but also something else, a little je ne sais quoi. It’s an art from. If the store is wrong about the holiday demand, they’re going to lose money!

 

ZOPHIA: All sorted!

 

(SFX: CHEERS)

 

BRIDGET: Okay, great work, Zophia! I’m actually feeling more festive! Judges, now’s your time to write down your score! Zophia, your mini-prize is a box of very old Peeps. But good news- I don’t think they ever expire?

(SFX: CHEERING) (MUSIC: FUN, UPBEAT GAME SHOW MUSIC)

RYAN: Okay, to recap! Nico made a wonderful origami menagerie, Zophia is covered in tomato soup and TJ Maxx has the hottest deals in the coolest 2019 fashions!  We’ve got three more players to go. We’re going to take a little water break, hydration is important, kids- and we’ll be back with more questions and answers!

 

–MIDROLL–

(MUSIC: GAME SHOW MUSIC)

 

BRIDGET: Welcome back to the Million Bazillion Presents: Money Mania.

 

RYAN: So far, Nico and Zophia have managed to power through our challenges to get the answers to their money questions! So far, we’ve learned that a $100 bill can still be kinda useful, and what happened to all those Valentine’s Day decorations on February 15th. We still have three players waiting for their turn. Will they find the answers they seek?

 

BRIDGET: They totally will because that’s what this show is all about!

 

(SFX: MAGICAL WIND CHIME) (SFX: ANGELIC VOICES IN THE BACKGROUND)

 

RYAN: What’s that light, catching my eye?

 

BRIDGET: Oh, sorry, it’s the trophy. It’s so sparkly, we have to keep moving it into the shade or it’ll blind the players. Sorry about that!

 

RYAN: Oh, don’t worry, it’s just…that trophy is amazing. A gleaming, shimmering icon of sweet victory-

 

BRIDGET: Okay, let’s get back to the game!  Evelyn, from Virginia Beach, Virginia, come on up.

 

EVELYN: Hi. I’m Evelyn, I’m 9.

 

(SFX: AUDIENCE APPLAUDS)

 

RYAN: Evelyn, tell us something about yourself.

 

EVELYN: I love math and I love eating ice cream.

 

RYAN: Wow, what a combo. Bet the math takes the sting off all the ice cream. And what’s your question today?

 

EVELYN: How do we know how much change to give back?

 

(SFX: MYSTICAL FLUTE)

 

RYAN: “How do we know how much change to give back?” Interesting question. Kind of Zen. What inspired this question?

 

EVELYN: Because I watch Million Bazillion and I have this question from math class.

 

(MUSIC: PENSIVE, PLAYFUL MUSIC PLAYS)

 

BRIDGET: Okay so we called up Phet Pease. She’s a STEM teacher, that is Science Technology Engineering and Math, at Wilson Middle school in San Diego. Her classroom runs their own in-school store. Here’s what she had to say:

 

PHET PEASE: Normally you will receive change when you’re purchasing something. Let’s say you go and buy a piece of candy and it costs $2. And if you pay with a five dollar bill, you will need to be given change back. It would be the difference between the amount that you paid versus the amount you were supposed to pay. So some people will subtract. So they’ll take the $5 and subtract two dollars, which will give you $3 back in change. And for others, they might want to count up instead. In that case, it would come out to the same thing, which would be $3 when you count up from two.

 

(MUSIC: EXCITING GAME SHOW MUSIC PLAYS)

 

RYAN: Okay Evelyn, let’s put that to the test. Here’s what you’re gonna do. We’d like to buy this toy from you for $4.18, using a $20 bill. We’ve hidden some small change in this ball pit. Can you dive in and find the exact correct amount of change to give back to us before the timer goes off?

 

EVELYN: Yeah!

 

RYAN: You get to choose if you’re going to subtract from $20, or count up from $4.18. Are. You. Ready?

 

EVELYN: I’m ready, Ryan.

 

RYAN: And go!

 

EVELYN: WOOHOO!

 

(SFX: SPLASH INTO BALL PIT SOUND. BALL PIT BALLS KNOCKING AROUND)

 

BRIDGET: Wow, it’s like she was born for this challenge, Ryan! Ryan?

 

EVELYN: Got one!

 

RYAN: I can’t take it anymore, I must have that trophy!

 

(SFX: BIGGER SPLASH INTO BALL PIT SOUND. BALL PIT BALLS KNOCKING AROUND)

 

BRIDGET: No, Ryan! This competition is for the kids!

 

RYAN: But I wanna play! I know I got what it takes for the trophy!

 

BRIDGET: Evelyn’s already so close! I don’t know which method she used, but she figured out how much change to get really fast!

 

EVELYN: You’re mine, Lincoln!

 

RYAN: I can still make this! Look, I’ve just found a two dollar bill! That’s novel!

 

BRIDGET: [DEEP SIGH]. Well I guess I better finish this next part on my own. Uh, the people who take your money when you buy something at a store are called cashiers. Cashiers often use a cash register, a machine, to keep track of what’s sold and that’s where they put the money you use to pay. If you DO use paper money and coins, the register is actually going to tell the cashier how much change to give you. But it’s still a good idea to generally estimate how much change you think you should get back. That’s just a good habit to get into, in case anyone makes a mistake.

 

EVELYN: Find a penny, pick it up. I got ‘em all!

 

RYAN: I’ve got a two dollar bill.

 

BRIDGET: Judges, I don’t know what you’re gonna do with that! Come on out, Ryan. You can’t win the trophy anyway, you’re a host! Not a player!

 

RYAN: Fine. Evelyn, your mini-prize for completing the round is the best thing you can buy with spare change- a single gumball from one of those machines that’s always by the store exit.[smattering of applause] Ok.  Let the game continue. We’ve got a good one coming up next. Meet Davey, from  Sioux Falls, South Dakota!

 

(SFX: CROWD CHEERS)

 

DAVEY: Hi, I’m Davey, and I’m 6.

 

RYAN: Davey, tell us a fun fact about yourself.

 

DAVEY: A fun fact about me is I like eating pickles!

 

BRIDGET: Pickles! Well yeah, they’re the best! Okay, Davey, what’s your question?

 

DAVEY: Why do receipts have so many words?

 

RYAN: Such. A. Great. Question. This sounds like it comes from personal experience.

 

DAVEY: I bought a toy car at the store and when I got my receipt, I was like, why doesn’t this receipt just say what I got and how much it cost?

 

RYAN: That’s an experience I think we’ve all had, these receipts are so. Long. And they’ve got way more stuff on there besides what you got and how much it cost.

 

BRIDGET: Lucky for you, we called an expert, actually someone who works for the very store where you bought your toy! Tina Potoff, the senior vice president of communications at Hy-ee!

 

TINA POTOFF: So Davey, to answer your question about why a receipt has so many words, because it does contain a lot of information, not only for the consumer but also for the store. At the very top of the receipt you’ll actually see not only the logo of the company but also the location where the product was actually purchased. As you continue down the receipt you’ll see the items that were abbreviated to make sure they all fit on one line, and then you’ll see the price of the item, and then you’ll see “TF” and that actually stands for taxable–.

 

(SFX: TINA SPEEDS UP AND HER VOICE FADES INTO THE BACKGROUND)

 

BRIDGET: Okay so yes, bottom line is…there ARE a lot of words on a receipt, but it’s all stuff that stores are trying to keep track of, or maybe YOU, as the shopper, will want to know. Especially if you need to prove you bought something or want to return it later.

 

TINA (her voice loud once more): Certainly this receipt, it can be long depending on how many purchases you make at the store. But also if you don’t want to have a hard copy receipt/your parents can elect to have their receipt sent to them digitally.

 

(MUSIC: EXCITING MUSIC PLAYS)

 

RYAN: Okay, let’s do this. Davey, here we have a pile of my paper receipts saved from throughout the year. Your challenge: match the receipt to the corresponding bag of stuff. And you’ll need to complete this before that big buzzer goes off.

 

DAVEY: I got this!

 

RYAN: GO!

 

BRIDGET: Wow, he is working fast on this one! Ryan, have you ever thought about why adults keep some receipts, and some they throw away?

 

RYAN: Well, I know I save all of my receipts in order to make totally legitimate tax deductions every year.

 

DAVEY: (OFF MIC) Maybe this one here?

 

BRIDGET:  So a receipt is proof that you bought something. It’s a good idea to look at it when you first buy something, to make sure you were charged what you thought you’d be charged. If you need to return something you bought, you will probably need the receipt. But otherwise, it’s probably okay to ditch that receipt!

 

DAVEY: Almost there!

 

RYAN: My favorite type of receipts are those suuuuuper long ones with all the coupons! That’s how a store shows they really love you. They’re keeping track of your shopping and want to offer you coupons to see if they can get you to buy a little more.

 

BRIDGET: Those guys! Oh, but actually, I also talked to Greg Buhr, he’s a supervisor at the California Department of Fee Adminstration. He actually suggested a way to get you in the habit of looking at your receipts, especially if you’re doing some traveling this spring or summer.

 

GREG: A fun game you can play is actually looking at the sales tax receipts. At least in California, there’s different tax rates in different cities and counties. So if you pay maybe say 7.25% in one city and you go to another city and say you pay 8.5%, you can compare those receipts and see the different tax rates and see which tax rates are administered in each of those cities.

 

DAVEY: Got ‘em all!

 

(SFX: CROWD CHEERING FOR DAVEY)

 

BRIDGET: Great work!

 

RYAN: Fabulous job, Davey! Judges, write down your score secretly.

 

BRIDGET: And for completing this challenge, you get the 2023 Consumer Guide to Sales Tax Rates, a super fun read! Okay, we’ve got one more contestant. Ryan, uh, what are you doing?

 

RYAN: Oh, just um, admiring the trophy. I just couldn’t help notice that it’s the exact right height for the trophy shelf I’ve been meaning to build in my den.

 

BRIDGET: Remember, the trophy is for the players!

 

RYAN: Right right right.

 

BRIDGET: Okay, let’s welcome Cecilia!! From Marietta Georgia!

 

CECILIA: Hi, I’m Cecilia! And I’m eight.

 

(SFX: CROWD CHEERING)

 

BRIDGET: The crowd loves you! Cecilia, what’s a fun fact about you?

 

CECILIA: My favorite colors are pink, purple and red. I like pink and purple because it’s the color of a sunset and I like red because it’s the color of a heart.

 

BRIDGET: Love that for you. Alright, the big moment, what’s your question?

 

CECILIA: What is profit?

 

BRIDGET: That’s a big one! Tell me…what made you start thinking about this question?

 

CECILIA: I listen to your shows and I heard the word profit. But I don’t know what it means.

 

BRIDGET: Ooh, that’s fair! And that’s big pressure on us all to get this one right then! So we called up Ashleigh Eldemire, she’s a professor of finance at the University of Tennessee. Here’s what she had to say:

 

ASHLEIGH ELDEMIRE: That’s a great question, Cecilia! So profit usually has to do with representing gains on something. So if you make an investment or you put a certain amount of money into something, the profit is what you get an excess of that initial investment. So it’s what you put in, plus a little something extra on top.

 

RYAN: For this challenge, Cecilia, you’ve gotta try to toss as many of these basketballs into the hoop as you can. After the first five baskets, you’ll score points. Try to score as many points as possible. This is kinda a metaphor for your answer, profit is like the extra that you make on top of what you first put in. Go make some profit! Are you ready?

 

CECILIA:  I think so.

 

(SFX: BASKETBALL/NET SWOOSHING)

 

RYAN: Wow, look at the arm on Cecilia! The concentration! Now when we put money into something…an investment, or a business idea, we generally want to make more money from it, because that’s money we can’t use for our everyday needs. But we should remember that profit isn’t a guarantee. And it might take a while to make money from an idea.

 

CECILIA: : Gahhhh

 

(SFX: BALL HITS BACKBOARD)

 

BRIDGET: So close! Another thing to keep in mind is that sometimes we do invest in things that won’t necessarily mean more money for us in the future. Sometimes what we’re really trying to invest in is something bigger than money, like making the world a better, safer place.

 

CECILIA:  Yes!

 

RYAN: Would you look at that, she’s made it to five baskets! From here on out, it’s all profit!

 

(SFX: BASKETBALL GOES THROUGH HOOP. BUZZARD SOUNDS)

 

RYAN: Alright, judges mark down your scores for Cecilia! Cecilia, for completing this basketball challenge, you take home a b-ball jersey, sized for basketball’s most diminutive power house, Muggsy Bogues! I hope it fits you!

 

BRIDGET: And now, it’s time to reveal the winner of Million Bazillion Presents: Money Mania!

(MUSIC: MOUNTING SUSPENSE)

 

BRIDGET:  …when we come back!

 

(SFX: CROWD DISAPPOINTED)

 

-MUSIC STING-

RYAN: Okay, we’ve tallied everyone’s points and are ready to declare a winner.

 

BRIDGET: Shall I open the envelope? (SFX PAPER RUSTLING) The winner of the first Million Bazillion Presents Money Mania is… La La Land!

 

RYAN: That can’t be right.

 

BRIDGET: Oh wait, the answer was on the back. The real winner is all of us! Because when you ask questions about the world around you, when you think about why things are the way they are, and we get to explore those questions together, we all win!

 

RYAN: Yes, that 100% true. But also, seriously who’s the real winner? Who gets the trophy?

 

BRIDGET: Everybody’s a winner, ok? Everybody did a great job, so let’s just split the trophy.

 

(SFX: CHAINSAW REVVING)

 

RYAN: OK, fine we’ll cut the chainsaw into six pieces and everyone gets one piece!

 

BRIDGET: (YELLING OVER CHAINSAW) Wait first of all, there were only five contestants!

 

RYAN: I know! I’m taking a piece for myself! I’d rather have a little bit of the trophy than never see it again! I call the shiny part!

 

BRIDGET: WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!

 

(SFX: CHAINSAW STOPS)

 

BRIDGET: I think we can all agree to share the trophy!

 

RYAN: Ok, every kid gets one day of the week with the trophy and I get the weekends!

 

BRIDGET: We’ll talk about it okay? Alright everyone, thanks for joining us for this first-and-possibly-only-round of… Million Bazillion Presents: Money Mania!

 

RYAN: But as always, we really like answering your questions and we hope you keep sending them to us. You can do that through our website, marketplace.org/million.

 

BRIDGET: That’s it for now!

 

–THEME MUSIC–

BRIDGET: Thanks so much for listening! We’re gonna rest up and be back next week to answer the question, why do some people get paid more than others?

RYAN: Get that episode delivered straight to your inbox by signing up for our newsletter at our website, marketplace.org/million. You can also send us YOUR money questions while you’re there!

BRIDGET: Special thanks to all those smart folks who gave us the answers to those questions! And to all the parents and grown ups who helped record our awesome kid question askers! You all rock! We had some additional voicing from Kimberly Adams and Drew Jostad. Thank you!

RYAN: Million Bazillion is brought to you by Marketplace, from American Public Media. This episode was written and hosted by (me), Ryan Perez. Bridget Bodnar is the senior producer and co-host and is also the director of podcasts at Marketplace.

BRIDGET: Million Bazillion is produced by Marissa Cabrera. Jasmine Romero is our editor. Bekah Wineman sound designed and mixed this episode, with help from Chris Julin. Our theme music was created by Wonderly. Francesca Levy is the Executive Director of Digital at Marketplace. Neal Scarbrough is the VP and General Manager.

RYAN: Million Bazillion is funded in part by the Sy Syms Foundation, partnering with organizations and people working for a better and more just future since 1985. And special thanks to The Ranzetta Family Charitable Fund and Next Gen Personal Finance for providing the start-up funding for this podcast, and continuing to support Marketplace in our work to make younger audiences smarter about the economy.

BRIDGET: If Million Bazillion is helping your family have important conversations about money, consider making a one-time donation today at marketplace.org/givemillion, and thanks for your support.

–Music Ends–

RYAN: That was a lot of fun.

(SFX: CAR APPROACHES. POLICE SIRENS)

COP: Hey, what are you guys doing in that abandoned lot? Are you hosting an obstacle course game show? You can’t be in there!

BRIDGET: Run!